At the age of 71, I had pretty much given up on my two adult sons ever getting married. Out of the blue, my youngest son came to me and announced he had met someone and wanted to know if I would like to meet her.
“Of course,” I answered, trying not to sound too eager.
“When?”
“In about 15 minutes,” Matt responded. “She’s on her way now.”
I later found out Matt and Cori had been dating for at least three months. This is typical of sons. They tell you very little, if anything, and only when absolutely necessary. I considered myself lucky to meet Cori as soon as I did.
Cori walked into our house, and within minutes I felt like I had known her forever.
I don’t know about Matt, I said to myself, but I think I love her.
I would soon discover that at the ages of 41 and 42, neither Cori nor Matt had been married before. It felt like a miracle.
From that moment until the wedding about two years later, our lives were greatly enriched by Cori. We learned about her Jewish heritage and religion and were warmly welcomed by her very large extended family. I felt like we had won the lottery.
After about 10 months of dating and getting to know one another’s families, Cori and Matt moved in together. We all knew they were deeply committed, so we patiently waited for Matt to propose. As the months passed, it was hard not to voice what everyone was thinking, which was, ‘What is he waiting for?’
I was on a girlfriends’ tennis trip when I got the call from Matt and Cori. Matt had finally proposed. I couldn’t stop the tears as in the video they sent me of the proposal, Matt revealed why he had waited. He told Cori he wanted to propose on what would have been my husband Jon’s and my 50th wedding anniversary, October 5, 2023. Jon died June 6, 2021.
Before the wedding, Matt and Cori asked me to write something for their special day.
The following is what I read at their wedding on June 20, 2024.
For Matt and Cori on their wedding day. . .
The later love blooms, the sweeter is its fragrance. Love found early in life has much to learn. Later love has experienced life with its ups and downs and is wiser for it. It is through the letting go of expectations that the most unexpected happens. This has been true for Cori and Matt. They found each other after a lifetime of searching, and their love is real and mature.
Mature love can disagree without being disagreeable. Mature love can argue without attacking or placing blame. Mature love is real love, and such love respects the other person despite the differences in opinions and viewpoints. Such love depends on the experience of surviving the hard times and coming out stronger as a couple. Such real, mature love is what I see in the love Cori and Matt share.
I believe your love grows without smothering, allowing each of you to spread your wings. Your love takes pride in your accomplishments and encourages and supports you in your failures. Such love can criticize gently without putting down ideas or self-esteem.
Real love never holds you back, but softly nudges you forward when you need that extra push. It holds your hand in times of joy and sorrow. It understands your deepest hurts and heals them by being there.
The love Matt and Cori share never takes the small stuff for granted. Their love always says “please” and “thank you” and most importantly, “I’m sorry” and “I forgive you.” Real love is always aware of the feelings of the other person. Such love is not perfect, but it’s always striving. It is in the striving that we show how much we care.
Marriage is a work in progress supported by the understanding that comes with such love. I see this kind of love manifested in Cori and Matt’s everyday commitment to each other. May God bless your love and allow it to flourish as you build a home and life together.
The moral of this story: Never give up on finding love.
By Connie Meyer
P.S. Teach Our Children Well: Passing On The Importance Of Trust And Authentic Relationships
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